We all feel stuck sometimes. In situations, in jobs, in relationships, in life. It can feel like we are walking through treacle or mud. And it can feel all-consuming. How do we start moving forward?
Often when there is a lot going on both cognitively and emotionally when we have that sense of being stuck. There is something happening on an unconscious level that keeps us in a safe and comfortable space, even when we don’t necessarily want to be there.
Visualising an alternate life can be difficult; a different way of being or doing can seem like a massive stretch, even though deep down, we all have the solution inside of us. We must stop and think: what are we gaining from staying where we are?
The truth is that we are often guided by fear, even when we don’t want to be. We don’t change our situation, job, relationship status because we are simply scared of the unknown. The stories we tell ourselves inside our heads may be fiction, but to us they feel real and we let them stop us from being where we want to be.
Changing our mindset is the only way we can see these challenges as opportunities, rather than moments to fall deeper into our comfort zone. We have to question our thought process to the point where we realise we need to change it.
Think about what comes up emotionally when you think about taking action. What is going on in your body, or with your emotions? Where are you feeling resistance? My blog about taking responsibility for your goals might help too – Taking responsibility for achieving your goals.
It is often emotional associations that keep us tied to a feeling of being stuck; if we are fearful that something will happen, our unconscious mind stops us from taking action. For example, if you heard stories of financial difficulties from a friend, you may have unintentionally created a negative unconscious thought pattern, believing the same might happen to you. So, when you feel something simmering inside of you, question it. How true actually is it? How likely is it to happen?
Feeling stuck may seem like a permanent state but losing faith in our ability to take action is common and very much temporary. Think about the very first thing you need to do – not everything you need to do down the line. And focus on that one thing.
Try this exercise:
Write down all the things you could do right now. Review the list and count the things you’re not going to do and think about why. Then, think about the things you do want to do and put them in priority order. Feel each activity in your body as if it’s already happening. Which feels exciting? Which feels like it will genuinely achieve the best result? And commit yourself to that one thing.
It is true that the best method of getting “unstuck” is to break down something massive into smaller action. With each step we take, the easier it gets, and none of us have to do it alone either – ask for help when you need it.
Feeling stuck is an overwhelming feeling but it encourages us to stop and reflect, so allow your self that time. Connect with what you’re doing in your life and make sure it’s important to you, that it aligns with your vision and that, most of all, it feels good.
The smallest steps get the biggest results. So, start today by taking consistent steps towards something you truly want, and don’t be afraid to take that action.
What one thing can you commit to today?
For more coaching tips and support, you can join my free Facebook group – The Coaching Collective.