As coaches, many of us find ourselves driven by client results. We want them to do well, to achieve their goals, and to feel accomplished. However, attaching ourselves to their successes and failures is detrimental to our client relationships. We must step back and realise their results are not our results; we simply support them in the process.
The core goal we are working towards isn’t to see tangible success (although this is a well-received after-effect), but to encourage meaningful and lasting change in those clients we work with. And the truth is, this means something different to different people.
How can we work towards creating that meaningful impact?
It is only when we get clear on what a client wants and doesn’t want that we can start to see the right personalised approach to take. What does change look like for them? What is the core reason why they are here?
To make an impact, as coaches, we must show up in the present, channelling our own positive mindset and energy. This gives the client a clean space to open up their own feelings and find their own clarity, rather than us directing them.
Find Your Own Coach
As a coach, we may feel shame in seeking out one of our own for help, but it’s actually very common that coaches need coaches themselves. This is because it’s difficult to see our own blind spots – we can’t see ourselves in the way others see us, no matter how hard we try. Read my blog – Why it's important to ask for help.
You could approach someone you already know – a coach you met during training or your peer mentor – or someone completely new. Either way, these interventions are useful for breaking down your own unconscious limiting beliefs so that you can hold a peaceful space for your clients.
Embrace Deeper Change
It is in these coaching sessions that you begin to challenge your belief structure. We all go through struggles, even coaches, and so it’s important to minimise any projection of these onto clients.
When I was doing my NLP Master Practitioner, I would often take a problem at face value. However, problems are often symptomatic of deeper, embedded thoughts and beliefs that consequently impact behaviour. It isn’t until you delve inside the mind that you can ask: what is really going on here? It’s all about identifying those patterns and creating a new way of being, doing, thinking, and behaving.
Overall, to create a meaningful impact as coaches, we do need to walk the walk. We must show investment in our own development because it’s never just about what goes on within a client session; it’s about what happens outside of it to prepare.
I’ve worked with clients who have made large sums of money working with me, and I’ve worked with clients who made deep inner changes that I know will last a lifetime. I’ve backed these individual goals regardless. And that’s what I love about what I do – seeing those unique positive changes in different clients. It’s why I continue to train coaches; there is nothing more impactful than creating a space that inspires change in the way we think, feel, be, and do.
I would love to know your thoughts about coaching and the change it can create in my free group on Facebook – The Coaching Community.